was busy for so almost 3 months, been busy for so many weeks, been home and be with family for so many days..and now today back in KL.. it feels empty..
i miss home..
i was never born a shopaholic..i never truly understand how a young lady will spend up to a certain amount of money buying clothes / shoes/ bags and etc etc every month. I mean where do u find the time to dress all that you had bought? it must be like a fashion show everyday at work including weekends..and to really dress up every morning, trust me, you gotta sacrifice some beauty sleep..
but again, as mentioned i have been in deficit since August and yes, Ping bought me another dress yesterday as early xmas gift.. goodness, i can’t even believe that i actually let him into doing it though i admit, i did lead him that way.. i mean since he is gonna buy me something for xmas, might as well getting something i needed now.. as good and as bad as it feels i know I’m evil. i really am..
In fact, as i was typing this, i realize in my mind, i needed shoes… n more clothes… chel told me ‘ sha, lei sei la’ translated ‘ sha, you r dead meat’.. i know..please help..
but u know.. haih.. this is hopeless..i need some nice belts too..
work hard = earn that much, stress level 9
work normal = earn normal, stress level 5
work less = earn less, stress level 1
work hard = earn not much, stress level 10
work normal = earn slightly above but not good enough, stress level 5
work less = earn just enough, stress level 2
are you willing to work hard? stressed hard? but earn more along the way?
or you are content with what you had at the moment?
i hate to start off my post by saying ‘ wah, it’s been some time ever since i wrote my last post. But yea, it’s been like what, 2 months? Uploading the picture is an hassle, the connection is bad and i guess it had given me an excuse not to update..
So many things happened within that 2 months when i had forgotten to blog.. i was kinda unmotivated, i would say..
During the time, I was busy sourcing clothes for mum n dad for bro’s wedding this coming December, faced some problems with people at work ( i hate politics and it irritates me more when i am dragged into it unwillingly), i need more money, i wanted a house / a home soon..renting a room in KL is no fun..i wanted to buy myself some pretty clothes, pretty bags n shoes.. the last time i shopped? during beginning of the year i guess.. it’s like a tradition to me, i shopped only once every chinese new year and those items are meant for the whole year through.. i love spending on things that i can get for my family and ping.. i guess because their happiness means the world to me..
then one day, i snapped.
that day it suddenly hit me..i was actually thinking that ‘ i think for people too much’ ….’I've worried too much for my family members, ping n friends’… ‘i would rather spend less on myself and splurge on those I love’.. then i think i realized ‘ i had forgotten about myself’..i am not saying that i am the greatest daughter/sister or even gf.. but i guess i wasn’t treating myself well too..
then, i started to want to leave to a place..i wanted to go to somewhere.. i need a break.. i want to be with myself ( jus me,no one else, even if it means traveling alone).. that 2 months.. my mind was trying to kill me and i’m screwed emotionally..Ping bought me to Genting for a break during his bday.. that was a wonderful escape..:)
from then onwards, i am like a newborn vampire..i have no sense of control.. not only am i continue to splurge for my family n ping…i begin to spend a lot for myself too..
i had managed to buy clothes/bags/accessories for myself every month since August ( August was like – my preborn period as vampire- i was still mild and i hunt down 2 Charles & Keith bags) till now, i’ve lost count.. i am spending like 2012 is just around the corner.. i am in DEFICIT every month until after 2010 Chinese New Year.. damn it..
money gone, but somehow i am happier and this is no good..i feel like i am becoming the ‘girl’ who will rather eat bread for 5 days to save enough for a top’.. i feel stupid as i typed this but i just can’t believe word like ‘ SALES’ could realli leave me smiling the whole day long, it got even worst when it is written as ‘WAREHOUSE SALES’.. i couldn’t allocate enough to satisfy my hunger..
i need help…. someone please control me..
else.. support me financially as i learn my baby steps as vampy.. hehehe shopping , anyone?
i had just bought a new toy last Saturday with nee. Guess what, RM60 for a bike, man where else can you get?!! i was pretty excited as now i can cycle even when it rains in the evening or even at night if i come back late from work.. no more excuses to miss my exercise routine! yes! it feels good to torture myself hahaha
Nee helped me from bringing it back in her car and she too has helped in putting the handle’s gloves in too..pictures were taken by nee also as she sits patiently as i assemble the unit…
As people always says, man looked ‘man’ when they are serious and focus, hey dude, i don’t look too bad too ya~ hahaha
after about 30mins , we are ready to give it a try… contestant num 1, YOU KHANG NEE, are you ready?
contestant num 2, AH SHA HO, are you ready?
BRING IT ON!!!
kayuh! kayuh! kayuh! hoo hoo.. kayuh kayuh!!
wooo!!!! and the winner is……..
pictures speaks a thousand words..i am humble you know..
Specially to nee…thank you girl~`
if ever u need me to carry another unit to your house, i’ll be more than glad to help.
Thank you for the help and i enjoyed your company lots too! muacks!!
it is 12.05am as shown on my PC..tonight the feeling is a bit different.. i feel no fear, no sadness, no excitement..nothing..the music keeps going..the weather ain’t great as it is rather stuffy tonight, there is no wind and no rain pouring..i guess i had my prayer answered for not wanting rain but not tat is is not raining, i wish it could instead..
i have always love the night, the sounds of insects outside the window, the feeling of peace and the cooling breeze..at this moment it feels i am at my own zone, in my own world… when is the last time i actually listen to songs and ignore all the happenings around me.. it feels so good.. 
what am i thinking now? i’m not too sure..my mind is blank, my heart is light and i only want this peaceful feeling to last longer..
btw, something jus came across my mind..today, i have just learned from my colleague today that she and her bf do have annual meeting on their anniversary every year.. they will each evaluate what they had promised to accomplished the year before and will see how far have they come…at the same time, it is also a day for them to set goals for the following year.. each person is to list down 10 items and by next year’s anniversary, they will have the annual meeting again…fascinating indeed..
i on the other hand think it is rather stressful to set expectations not only to myself ( myself is still ok..) but also I’ll be keeping track on the things that he has planned or set to do..but at the same time, i too understand also how as per my colleague, this will help them to work harder to achive their goal, ie..to go on tour in 2010 or personal goal like changing to a better job for a better tomorrow..
in a relationship it seems healthy to be able to enccourage each other to strive and come to think of it, it is not such a bad idea too after minus-ing the annual meeting feeling and organization.. i prefer to share dreams and hopes through common daily sharing and to keep it in the heart while working hard towards the same goal..i wish to be on the same page as knowing if myself and ping share the same target, it will drives me to work harder and to achieve something that belongs to us..
unless, the meeting comes with wonderful food and lovely environment, i don’t mind having meeting at all hehehe nite..
rain rain please go away..or rather rain at nite will do..thank you, muacks.
Published September 19, 2009 personal Leave a Commentit has been 4 days tat it kept raining in the evening..4 dyas in total including today that i had missed the chance to go jogging..
4 days is not doing any good to me since when it rained, i have the urge to..
eat to keep myself warm
eat to keep myself out from boredom
eat to keep myself from feeling hungry – raining days always makes me hungry.. a warm bowl of noodle always does the trick..
eat to keep myself from…er..nothing.. jus plainly eating..
the bad news is, i’ve savoured KFC, MCD and Kimchiharu( Koren food) in this 4 days..tonight i have a date with Sa n Wendy lagi..
Now is 3.57pm..initial plan 4.00pm jogging, now praying hard tat it will stop raining by 5.00pm so tat i still can at least run for an hour today making 4 days to 3..
*fingers crossing*
went dinner with ping today and after dinner, we sort of walked past a simple yet home-y bakery at Jaya One . I’ve walked passed this bakery a few times before tonight and everytime I do get tempted to try out the cakes there and finally, tonight i bought a cookie and a cup cake..
I’m not too sure how famous this bakery is however, judging from the price, i think the cakes should be tasting wonderful.. a cupcake that cost up to RM6.90 per piece, i can literally buy myself a lunch / dinner for a day..yet, as it’s name written Just Heavenly, perhaps it will bring me to heaven if not angels appearing before me when i take a bite..
However,if you ask me.. the cupcake certainly does not worth RM6.90 and the cookie is TOO SWEET and regular to cost RM4.90 apart from the fact, it does smells pretty good. Kinda disappointing and i don’t think i will buy it again.. cupcake = RM6.90 per piece, i rather have a decent slice of cake from Secret Recipe..
photos taken using my poor handphone.. it may not justify the outlook so you might want to visit www.justheavenly.biz ( the pictures there looked very nice though)
personally, i don’t like it.. regretted and i’m RM11.80 poorer.
today is Sept 15, how many more months can i endure?
sometimes, i found it hard to understand some people’s act..i do not understand the intention behind in making other people’s life miserable..what is the joy that they can find out from there? I always believe everyone has a kind self deep inside for we have feelings even to our enemy..how can i rationalize a situation whereby someone has purposely kick the kitten and still don’t think they are wrong(yet it suppose to be hilarious!!)? or someone who purposely lead a blind man walking without giving him a stick to hold on?
often i will come to a stage where i don’t understand how a person can act in a certain way..i hate the feeling for being unable to accept such situations.. i know i can’t have people to act according to my way or to ways that i think it should be..i know it very well but at the same time i can’t help but to think why are there so many f**kers around..
mum says ” 你的执着会让你很辛苦..看开一点。。” 是的妈。。( Your stubbornness will only make yourself suffer..try to be more optimistic)
ping says ” 一种米阳白种人。。” 是的老公。。( literally translated , one type of rice but can bring up hundreds of different types of people, meaning, it is a reality that there are all kinds of people living around us)
Still this does not help much in keeping myself feeling balanced..
i choose ” 我不需要明白她 －因为她是天生可悲的。。” ( i don’t need to understand her as she is born to be pathetic by nature)
perhaps with such thinking, i feel better as i too can – not always be generous to these people..so shoot me.
what is in your mind when you usually jog?
i used to picture myself wearing my favorite dress standing next to ping for my bro’s wedding, it somehow makes jogging less tiring and more enjoyable…in fact, after sometime, jogging no longer serve the purpose for losing weight..it has become something that i actually like doing it.. i like to sweat and it always feels good when i started sweating….
i went jogging today and for some reason i can’t seems to focus. there were so many things going through in my mind and what i fear most is that i can’t and i don’t have a clear picture in my mind..i can’t even picture myself looking better after the jog.. this used to be the motivation for me and somehow it is not there..
nevertheless, i finished an hour of jogging + walking today but i wasn’t really happy..i hate it when i lost the vision..it has been happening for these couple of days..
p/s: seems like i am about to start a jog dairy here..
my can’t live without jogging partner
